Tonight, I am thinking a lot about my dad who died last March ( You can read the post here: http://bellaisabella15.wordpress.com/2011/03/19/the-end-of-the-day/) . I got to thinking of him as I was going through a box of stuff of his that I brought back with me from the Bay Area where he died.
My dad was a hard-headed lawyer, born in France and given a once over by Texas where I was raised until I was 14. Even though he was throughly hard-boiled, inside he was the sweetest man anyone could ever know. Ever since I could remember, he had always been my best friend and, an avid car collector, and cook who was only person who would serve good ol’ Texas BBQ with Bouillabaisse.
My father reminds me a lot of Marc, he and my father are the only two men that I have felt really ever truly “got me”. I know I have made a lot of mistakes, but I have told him all of them, including being an escort ( whether this was a mistake or not, I think the jury will always be out) and all the time I spent with Thierry. My dad always knew what path I should take, but he let me figure out for myself and learn from life’s lessons
Unlike the impression you get from my blog, I am not the completely outgoing and outspoken young woman my writing makes me out to be. On the outside, I am cheerful, but inside, there is a sacred little girl who has gotten over her head. SO many things have changed for me in the past few years. I went from being a single college graduate to being an escort, a wife, and then finally a mother all by the age of 27.
Sometimes I am happy about it, and sometimes it scares the hell out of me…
